I have a huge vision for the next phase of my life.
I want more MOMS to be successful FROM home so that more families can have MOMS at home who want to be at home, but need the income. Moreso, I want moms who WANT to work from home to be more successful from the get-go with SUPPORT.
I needed the right person to help me accomplish this. This is bigger than me.
I did MANY interviews for this person.
I had a feeling after the interviews who it needed to be. And this morning I told myself I would make a choice.
This morning I woke up with a heavy choice involving an investment of money through hiring a team member with skills that I don't possess to work alongside me to make my vision become a reality. More than the investment, its the feeling of letting someone really know my heart and vision... and wondering if they will care about it as much as I do!
I meditated on it. I prayed on it. I opened my scriptures for inspiration and read the words, "And I was led by the Spirit, not knowing beforehand the things which I should do. Nevertheless I went forth..." 1 Ne. 4: 6-7
I reflected on my current personal development book, "No Limits" by John C. Maxwell and the chapter I happen to be reading this week entitled "Your Capacity to Lead" and his exhortation that I have to be humble and I have to be willing to let others help me. I have to share my ideas and I have to be able to allow others expertise to grow my idea farther than it could in my own hands.
I then looked to my favorite podcasts and turned on Lori Harder's, "Earn Your Happy" episode 426: "When you KNOW you can't keep doing the same thing." And she spoke directly to my soul!
Friends. I am freakishly stubborn sometimes. It takes SO MANY puzzle pieces falling into place for me to just recognize when the answer is PLAIN to be seen.
Last week I was TORN with all the interviews! They all seemed SO knowledgable. Of course they would... because they have skill sets and passions that I simply do not have. And I don't want to try to develop them or I'll go insane. Thats really how I feel! I want to just TEACH and empower and assist moms in their home businesses and teach TRUTHS. I want to bring more TRUTH to moms who need it to bring more LIGHT into their lives about how amazing they are, and how much JOY they can find in their life choices. I want to empower moms to take care of themselves and feel capable, confident and shine their lights! I want to interview successful mompreneurs and learn their ways! (If you are one of these, please reach out to be featured!)
I don't want to master the ins and outs of email marketing. I don't want to and honestly don't feel called to master email sequences, tagging and ad targeting and re-targeting and mapping out course launches. I don't want to create content calendars and webinar scripts. Although I DO know about them, and I know where they fit into online business, and can implement them on a small scale. But to grow this to where I know it can go? And impact the lives I know God is calling me to impact? This is bigger than me. And Gosh Dangit I know it.
It has been a hard journey putting into words how many of my failures are because I simply didn't have the faith to hire someone to help me. How many lives have I not touched because I have been trying to do all the things all on my own no matter how big it gets? How many people have fallen through the cracks because I don't have great skills for tracking and systemically working my content?
Well folks. NO MORE.
I'm done underserving others.
I'm done not following through on BIG things because it seems scary.
I'm done not taking up space in this world because I feel like I'm not worthy. That someone else more qualified can help people better than I.
I'm done allowing Satan so much room in my mind. It is HIS voice that speaks of fear, unworthiness, and self doubt.
My core values from when I was a child are continually being pulled up as I grow as a person! Yours will too I wager. This hard decision has indeed forced more of those roots to expand and change.
When you grow up in an incredibly structured home, rules and expectations reign while risk and failure are extremely cautioned against. I recognize that this has had a hand in play with why this has been so hard for me. In 2014 I joined a business and team that had me surrounded by a different caliber of humans. And as I changed my circles of influence, the voices I sought for support and mentorship in my life choices, this thread of truth kept showing up at every decision making point that felt scary. These words and thoughts seem to embody the true way of becoming more in life as far as I understand right now:
Risk. Feeling uncomfortable. Fear of being bigger- of taking up more space in the world. There is this gut fear of letting others truly be on your team, believing they really will elevate you higher and be as committed as you are to your mission. A feeling of stepping into the dark, and yet you feel excited.
And more that I’m failing to transfer in a way that feels right.
I’ve made and reached so many goals I never knew I could by pushing through these thoughts and committing to just do my best. I've achieved things in the last 2 years by yet again shifting who I spend my time with to even BIGGER thinkers than the ones before who are on a similar mission as my own. But this time it feels even bigger.
I feel I’m on the cusp of the crux of my “story.” And that feels big. I’ve felt a real adversary tugging at every opportunity leading to this decision today. I’ve literally felt like I’ve been walking uphill through sand to get here. And when I arrived last week? I still felt a huge weight trying to convince me it’s too scary. It’s too risky. You aren’t really ready for this. You can’t really follow through. It’s going to be so hard. Etc etc etc.
But I’ve learned that those are the words of Satan.
When I turn my face toward God, (which interestingly enough is in actual translation turning my face toward god, toward "home" toward "light" translates to the word “repent”) I hear these words: You are capable! You are needed! Growth is joy and growth feels uncertain simply because you’ve never been that version of you before. I will lead and guide you, but you have to CHOOSE to move.”
And that’s what I did today.
Friends, when we listen to Satan.... he will NEVER be cheering us on to become more. He will NEVER cheer us on and help us feel capable. He whispers words of fear, inadequacy, unworthiness, fear of success, fear of the chaos it "might" bring, fear of failure, fear fear fear and more fear.
When we repent, as the scriptures urge us to do DAILY----- and remember, that word REPENT simply means to "turn toward the LIGHT." To come back "HOME." "Repent" has been mistakenly given the definition too often as an action we need when we have done something morally wrong. If you look at the original translations way back in the Hebrew when God was teaching Adam and then Moses "the law" the "repentance" was simply to live a life turned to God.
When we repent daily, and listen only to that God who wants us to have ALL THE SUCCESSES and serve all the people and to become a beacon of hope and truth and love for so much more than ourselves and our families, we WILL achieve it!
So not only did I make a critical choices for business growth--- but I achieved a huge success in my faith by turning from Satan and giving my fears to God and letting Him fire my beleif in me as His daughter 100% capable of doing what my heart tells me I can and want to do.
I am SO SO motivated after making the decision I did today.
Action cures fear.
God is right there waiting to help you successfully navigate your next steps towards success and your dreams. But you HAVE to choose to do it and then actually MOVE in the direction to do it so the next steps can appear. Action toward God's light shuts out Satan's darkness.
I am So excited for the future! More than I think I have ever been!
If you are feeling fear or anxiety about something... I invite you ponder on what voice you are subscribing to. Is it your TRUTH inspiring you to take up space in the world and shine your light for all to see? Or is it a smaller version of you that Satan wants to remain small so no one will see and benefit from your life?
Ponder on it and then choose to move in the direction of your dreams!
Today I invested before I feel ready. I can't see the tracks ahead for my train full of dreams and vision. I invested and hired before its all visible, and that scares me. But I am FILLED with motivation and peace now that I have taken ACTION.
Where are you at in your choices to MOVE and take action and invest in things you KNOW you need to to fulfill the call God has planted in your heart even though you don't feel ready? I guarantee that if you take the leap... the next steps will show up.
All my love and belief in your dreams and vision,