"The key to success is to start before you are ready." -Marie Forleo
This quote has been true for me in EVERY circumstance on my journey to creating the life I was meant to live. The life that GOD and I designed before I was born. The life that ALL of you were meant to be a part of and witness. Isn't that beautiful to contemplate? I didn't have to have it all figured out. I didn't have to be perfect in anything. I didn't have to be a certain age or have a certain amount of money to be able to accomplish my goals. I just MOVED forward and the resources came to me when it was TIME.
One of the things I get to coach moms through consistently is this, "I'm doing all the things to move my business forward, but it's just not growing. What am I doing wrong?" And what I mentioned above, is a HUGE piece to answering this.
There are basic, literal business systems that you MUST have in place to move an online business forward- and you can find those here:
But then there are the MINDSET pieces that must be addressed as well.
Three in particular seem to be the most common blocks to growth:
and lack of ACTION
Check out this 9 minute video to learn about these three and HOW to overcome them (start about a minute in to skip the intro and info on the download I shared above):
I want to share some of the milestone moments I've had that propelled me into a space I did NOT feel ready for, but that ultimately blessed my life and created the skills, mindset and perspectives I needed to move FORWARD in my life.
#1 - Meeting and marrying my spouse
I cried the day I realized I was in love with my boyfriend and wanted to marry him. I was 18, and felt I wasn't "ready" for "real life." I had PLANZZZZZZ! I wasn't READY. I KNEW that if I got married to a man who also had future aspirations, my plans would change. My intuition told me to marry him. My intuition told me it was the RIGHT thing to do, and I listened. God definitely was in the details prompting me along the way. What I didn't know, what how much I needed my husband to do the things I wanted to do. He has been the BEST support I could have ever asked for. We compliment each other so perfectly I can't even describe how almost eerie it is. lol! He is my calm in the storm. He is my safe place when things are scary. He is my voice of reason when I'm freaking out. He is my BEST friend and confidant. HIS love and support has been the backbone carrying me through ALL the things life has brought to me. I would give up all my PLANZZZZZ a million times over knowing the power he would bring to my life. Two heads are definitely better than one. I often feel like with our marriage, 1+1 actually somehow equals 3. We are WAY more effective, way more joyful, way more capable, and certainly giving more light to the world when we are together versus anything we could try to create alone.
#2 - Starting a family right away, while in school
Yes. I was a mom at age 21. I distinctly remember the day I walked into our shabby little basement apartment a few blocks from the university my husband and I were attending and felt that someone was needing me. Someone else was supposed to be there with me. With us. For weeks I felt that someone was missing every time we got into the car. Every time I did the laundry. Every time I set the table. My husband and I discussed our goals, and having a family was definitely one of them. But now? I didn't feel READY. We didn't have steady income. We didn't have another room to put a baby in. But with faith in God, I moved forward. A few months later I was pregnant. I learned to lean on my professors who were amazingly understanding, and helped me navigate staying in class while being sick, and getting an internship that I could do office work at, etc. When it was time, it was a ROUGH delivery that ended in emergency c-section. Due to a breast surgery I had had years before, breast feeding was a no go. However.... all of this happened during my junior year of college while taking 17 credits and I earned a 4.0 that semester. HOW? I don't know. I don't remember anything really happening that year that made me smarter or more efficient. What I do know, is that I learned that God was there directing me. I learned that I could do MORE than what I thought I was capable of. I learned that GOD knows what we are capable of and when we need certain lessons, and gives us professors who understand, school schedules that are flexible, and memory spikes to earn A's when we need them as we link arms with Him and MOVE forward toward our greater good. That first baby? She has been the KEY element to my success NOW. Having an almost 16 year old at this point in my life who regularly babysits, cleans house, is responsible and one of my good friends makes me shake my head in how unREAL it is that my life is THIS perfect.
So while I learned a lot being a 21 year old having a baby with birth trauma and being in college... I can see how God also was orchestrating my capacity success for THIS season of my life too. SO many lessons and an abundance of compassion and wisdom has come into my life because I moved forward with a family BEFORE I felt ready.
#3 - Starting a business from my home
In 2008 our finances were a mess due to unforeseen medical expenses with our second child. Our kids were just 4 and 1, and I found out I was expecting #3 without any trying or planning. I cried a lot. Things needed to shift. I needed something for me, and I needed something that I could contribute financially. I was not READY to roll up my sleeves and start a business, but I did anyway. I leaned on my childhood passion of music, and decided to start teaching lessons in my home privately 1:1. I stopped into one of the local music stores and just took a deep breath and asked the head sheet music organizer and recital planner if she could give me pointers on teaching lessons out of my home. She directed me to a flyer sharing that a music teaching method creator would be in her store giving lectures about how to help children learn music that very weekend, and that I would be able to ask other local teachers questions at the same event. It was free. I went. And boy did I learn a TON. I learned what to charge, I learned how to write a flyer for registration, I learned basically everything I needed to know to get started. That single event spurred on an 8 year successful teaching career, and thousands in revenue for my family. That one lady at the counter became a lifelong friend, and to this day she is a light in my life. Many of my students keep in touch and have included me in important events in their lives and written some of the most thoughtful and kind things about me in holiday cards and other notes of appreciation. Parents have become lifelong friends, and the whole thing helped me progress in my personal confidence in creating something that didn't' exist... that I had NO idea how to do, including talking to strangers, mentors really, who I needed.
#4 - Starting an ONLINE business in health and fitness coaching
This one had me staying up at night. I could NOT see myself teaching health and fitness courses. I could NOT see myself being an inspiration to anyone in the health world. If anything I felt like a failure for being a weight loss story in 2014. But a friend of mine showed confidence in me and confidence in a parent company who would give me an instant website, business system and training. I did NOT feel ready. I was SCARED OUT OF MY MIND. Early on in this career a mentor shared with me, "Build your wings on the way down." I had NEVER heard this perspective before. I was always the straight A student... where anything can be done perfectly with enough study and planning. But this business was NOT panning out that way. I literally was taught to figure it out as I went, and it was REALLY hard at first. Learning to "fail forward" wasn't something in my wheelhouse, until NOW. I can't forget the community I began to be a part of with this career. The community of people that are in this company (I'm still active in this career) are the BEST kind of humans. They just want to SERVE! These people in this industry want people to rise to higher levels of living. They know that health and fitness are the low hanging fruit to all change, and that is what we help people do. We help them get MOVING to show themselves they ARE capable of anything! 18 months of failing forward later I was earning almost $1000 a week and earning exotic trips with my husband and hosting team retreats and the list goes on. Starting this before I was "ready" and continuing to learn by failing has probably been the greatest blessing in my life to this point. This belief that you can fail multiple times and still succeed has helped me with my marriage, motherhood, and myself as I go through personal challenges.
#5 - Having baby #5
This one was a doozy. We were SO SURE we were done after baby #4. The baby stuff was SOLD. The baby room was renovated into an office. My career was at an all time high, we were DONE with that phase of life, and it felt GOOD. But then, God. God knew I needed some massive growth. God knew that my family needed massive growth. God gave me and my husband a personal miracle to help us move forward and try to conceive our 5th baby. Ask me about it sometime. :) But I was DEFINITELY not ready. I didn't WANT to be ready. I moved forward anyway, and we were pregnant 2 months later. Baby #5 came with horrific pregnancy complications and an even more horrible birth experience, changing my body and mind forever. My husband and I grew a million fold that year and the year of healing that followed. My other 4 kids were gifted an experience learning to be responsible for themselves (meals, laundry, grades, projects), take charity from others, and see family support like they've never seen before or since. My health business took a dive and hasn't quite recovered, even now. (I have faith that it will though. :) I have the tools.) SO many things have happened since that baby was born. I am living on a level I didn't even know was possible. I went through a faith crisis (mostly due to being emotionally broken) that has now created a level of faith that I didn't know I was capable of as I pushed through and rebuilt my belief systems. My compassion, empathy, and ability to have instant insight into what people need has been incredible. Our marriage is on a level I didn't even know was possible. That level of trust and pure love only comes when you've been through trauma together. I'm positive of that.
#6 - Starting an Online business coaching others through business growth, purpose driven motherhood, and healthy habits to sustain it all.
And here we are. Starting my own brand has been probably the scariest thing I've ever done and I feel totally incapable and the imposter syndrome plaguing me almost biweekly is maddening. I've met some incredible mentors that I didn't believe would consider mentoring me years ago. I've met some women that inspire me DAILY to take action on my goals and create my dreams into the world. I've learned how to delegate and to work in tandem with people and to TRUST others more than ever. It has been exhilarating and emotionally taxing. I've grown SO much. And I feel like I'm just starting....... I definitely don't feel READY, but I'm moving forward ANYWAY and living through the fear ANYWAY. It's been worth every hard day so far. I look forward to living in this state of the unknown for the rest of my life! Is this me we are talking about!?!?!? AHHH! It is so exciting! This is me we are talking about! Someone who is always being willing to fail, always building as I go, and always being on the lookout for those I can serve, those I can link arms with and teach so THEY can then serve, and always treasuring those I will keep with me always as those close confidants and true sisters on this journey of life. I LOVE MY LIFE!
These blessings, insights, lessons, and growth have ALL come because I started before I felt ready. Have FAITH in yourself my friend. All the struggles are for your GOOD.
YOU CAN DO THIS.
All my love and belief,